The first obvious question is: what is ego dissolution? The reality is that,as you go along, the meaning of the journey of the ego dissolution itself changes and what knowledge I hold know will certainly be changed as I drop ever more pieces of the self I hold inside. I can say for now is that ego dissolution means for me to drop aspects of yourself as you go along.
The idea may be quite foreign at first, and certainly feels like an impossible task. However, like any other seemingly impossible task, we start from the beginning, and we try to see what is the first step one can take. The difficult part is that it is a completely individual journey and what works for some does not work for others.
Nonetheless, there is somethings I can say about my journey and you can see if you identify or relate to any of the points I’ll bring forth.
The first point I want to make relates to the challenges I found on this journey. The most difficult one to overcome, has been the feeling of my growing ego. Yes you have heard me well, since I have started on this path I have the feeling my ego is bigger than ever. Let me explain more clearly, as I find that I have finally lost some parts of my self, the ego congratulates itself immensely. My ego loves to imagine that I am better than anybody else because I can dissolve parts of me. My ego loves that I can manipulate some aspects of perception. But of course, the moment it congratulates itself I lose any ability. (I know you probably want to know what I can do and how, and I will make many articles on it)
This has most surely been the hardest aspect of them all. To accept that the more you walk on this path the more danger there is that you won’t succeed. Where before my ego was great, but many times unsure and insecure, now it feels like it holds more certainty and security that ever. It feels to me that it is getting harder to dissolve aspects of myself than when I first begun my journey. How ironic!
I will tell you one practice that I do to dissolve the ego. One of the things I do, is, to choose one topic that I want to let go of and open myself to that learning task, for the months to come. I do that until I feel the subject is in its majority resolved. One example was for me to let go of the idea of forgiveness. I will warn you that when you really focus on this topics many unwanted situations will rise for you to have the opportunity to deal with the chosen topic.
It is very difficult for me to talk about this simply because many times, it seems full of very irracional and confusing actions and reactions either from my ego or from the world around me.
Self Growth | Ego Dissolution | Lea Autumn | Spirituality
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